As I drove through the gigantic campus at the University of Florida in Gainesville yesterday, I noticed a young lady, on a bike, pedalling through heavy traffic, one arm on the handlebars of her 10 speed and the other hand busily texting on her phone (she could have been Tweeting or Facebooking, or looking for directions to her next class). I was struck by the absurdity, and the danger, of what she was doing. She could have easily been killed.
I then began to notice, among the hundreds of students walking everywhere on campus (I was told enrollment now tops 55,000) that many of them, maybe even most, were not watching where they were going at all. On foot, on bikes, on skateboards, they all had their hands and eyes glued to their phones.
Admission: I have a Blackberry. I use it. It has made my life and work easier and has allowed me to streamline my communication. So this is not a rant against technology. It is a simple observation that technology, like any other medium, can easily overtake our lives, usurp our energy, and actually make us more scattered, less focused, less patient, and more easily irritated. Yet my greatest fear is that our immediate access to all forms of communication, information, and entertainment has the potential to negatively effect the way we actually interact with other human beings.
I've noticed that teenagers have a difficult time maintaining eye contact with me for more than about 10 seconds in a conversation now. I've noticed that while at lunch with folks, the ones who keep their phones on jump when it makes a sound alerting them to a message of some sort. I've even noticed in my own life that I no longer just expect people to communicate with me on my phone, I anticipate it...often times reaching for my Blackberry to see if I have any sort of message even though I have not been alerted by a ding, bell, buzz, or vibration. It's like muscle memory takes over and without event thinking about it, it's in my hands, stealing away my attention from other important tasks (eating, reading, driving...).
Bottom line? I think we are overstimulated. There is simply too much information out there for me to digest. I can't read it all, much less retain most of it. I can't even skim all the articles that people link to in their tweets. Last week after speaking at a college event, I received over 300 Facebook friend requests in a 24 hour period. I don't even have time to click "ignore" or "accept" for them all.
So what's teh resolution? I don't know what it is for you, but for me, it's pretty simple.
1. Know when to TURN IT OFF
2. Know when to IGNORE IT
You cannot do it all and you will drive yourself insane if you don't set boundaries and limits. The people who get angry at you for doing this are probably the people who would drain you of precious energy anyway...the kind that would be better spent reading your Bible, praying on your knees, wrestling with your kids, going on a date with your spouse, or having a face to face conversation with a good friend. With your phone turned OFF.
Comments
August 26 2010
Matthew Boyd
Clayton,
I appreciate this post as my wife and I bought our first smart phones two weeks ago and I have been virtually glued to mine ever since. I have noticed myself using not only texting, but facebook and twitter, while driving, which is illegal in NC where I live. I am also guilty of spending more time in the evenings playing with the phone then spending quality time with my wife. I appreciate this post and helping bring this to my attention!
August 26 2010
Trey Bradley
Thanks for posting this Clayton. I needed to be reminded of this, and I agree wholeheartedley. Hope you and your family are well.
August 26 2010
Tiffany
Thank you for saying what so many of us need to hear. I really needed this today as I am trying in my own life to TURN IT OFF:)
August 26 2010
James Vance
What an accurate observation. I too find myself anticipating the next text, tweet, or email on my smart phone. It’s interesting to me, that during the times I’ve been without a phone ( I spent a year in Iraq without one.) that aftert he inital fix wore off and I wasn’t feeling needy about it, I actually preferred not having it. My stress level fell and it’s during those times that some of my best relationships were forged. I think it’s incredibly important to take inentional steps to reduce our exposure to the access that technology allows us. When we do, we stop talking AT each other and begin to talk WITH one another, and that is where real connections are made. Great thoughts!!!
August 26 2010
rhett f
Thanks for a great reminder of something that is an absolute truth! (The irony of posting this from my phone is not lost on me lol)
August 26 2010
Brooke
I constantly turn my phone off and ignore it, I don’t even like answering it anymore, and I hate texting. My friends hate it but I never neglect to get back in touch with them, usually in person. Mainly because I lost it for a few months and couldn’t afford another one. In that time I realized how bad my “addiction” was. I started reaching for a phone that wasn’t there! In a conversation I like to keep eye contact with the person I am talking with, and I notice when there hands go into there pockets that they check out of our conversation. Just to busy to say hello! They got another text or a calendar reminder, and suddenly I am talking to a person who isn’t there. Thanks for this!
August 26 2010
Michelle Webb
Ouch!! That stung. In a good way.
August 26 2010
JimmyT
Hey brother. I like the practical side of this argument/observation you are making but I wonder what we might uncover if we go a level or two down and test the spiritual.
It seems to me, in my experience, is an obsession for attention that comes from my formula of value. I want people to notice me, and that keeps me distracted to see if someone has commented on my latest post or status update.
How about a follow up to this post and dive into that as well.
Great observations!
August 28 2010
amanda
Great word, Clayton! It was good to see you and your family a couple of months ago. I know dad really enjoyed spending time with you. Have a great weekend!
August 30 2010
scott webber
Okay, you got me! Message noted.
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