by: Clayton King

But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for His possession, so that you may proclaim the praises of the One who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light. Once you were not a people, but now you are God’s people; you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy”  —1 Peter 2:9–10

My life seemed fairly simple as a kid. Then I started middle school.

Everything changed: my body, my desires, my thoughts, and my attention. I had always thought girls were gross. Then all of a sudden, they were all I could think about. And I wasn’t alone. My guy friends were going through a similar metamorphosis—so were all the girls we secretly dreamed about. This led to a new form of entertainment: relationships.

Guys started flirting with girls, and girls started whispering about guys. What I once found disgusting suddenly became an obsession. All I wanted was a girlfriend! A girl would make me confident, secure, and cool. I would become one of the guys and be accepted by them if I could just get a girl to like me. I desperately hoped I would be chosen by a cute girl because that would validate me as a guy.

But as the days became weeks and the weeks became months, not a single girl chose to like me. I became more self-conscious and more insecure. I wondered how I was going to convince a girl to like me when I wasn’t even sure if I liked myself. I was trying to fill the natural human desire to be noticed, to find affection and love through a relationship, but I kept coming up empty. I was emotionally vulnerable and spiritually insecure.

If you know that the God of the universe chose you to be His child, why would you ever let another person define who you are or who you will become?

Middle school turned into high school, and I grew a foot and lost forty pounds and became a football player. Girls began to notice me, and a few of them even chose to like me. It made me feel awesome for a little while, but there was a deeper longing inside my heart. The security that I hoped a girlfriend would bring me never came. I realized that only Jesus could fulfill my longing to matter, to belong, and to be chosen by someone.

If you know that the God of the universe chose you to be His child, why would you ever let another person define who you are or who you will become?

When you’re tempted to base your identity on a relationship, remember that Jesus gave up His life to give yours value. If a girl likes you one day only to reject you the next, remember Jesus’ love doesn’t flip-flop. He is consistent. He is faithful, and His love is eternal.

Girls, dating, drama, and relationships are here today and gone tomorrow, but Jesus is the one consistent love you can always count on, no matter what. You’ve been chosen by God. Will you choose to make your relationship with Jesus the most important one in your life? You have a choice. Make the right one.  (Taken from True Love Project, Lifeway Publishers) 

Learn more about Clayton King.